One of my most embarrassing moments happened at a roller skate rink when I was about eleven-years old. Tonight, twenty some years later, I had another experience that will forever make me cringe. Or maybe laugh out loud.
Let’s rewind a bit and go back to the first occurrence. I was an overweight pre-teen doing to the best I could to look graceful on a pair of roller skates. It was a school sponsored event and everyone was there. I was zipping around, noticing a group of very good looking teenagers huddled together at one of the side resting places when I felt myself lose control. I desperately tried to regain my balance as I flew across the floor toward the very good looking teenagers. “Please don’t fall into them,” I repeated to myself.
They frantically waved their arms screaming, “No!”
I plowed into them like a bowling ball. They were struck down one by one by the overweight chick on skates. I am certain at least one of them never forgot that night.
Tonight I was at a roller rink with my children for a birthday party. My husband, being the sport that he is laced up. He took the three oldest out while I stayed back with my ten month old. I pushed her stroller over to an indoor picnic table and attempted to sit down. Immediately, I realized I misjudged where the seat was in relation to where my ass was. One cheek grazed the edge of the bench and I felt myself losing balance. I desperately tried to stabilize myself. I spun around and tripped over my own feet and slammed against the floor. Directly in front of me was no other than a group of teenage boys. So, if you suddenly find a you-tube video of a mother falling flat on her face at a roller rink, chances are it is me.
To think, I wasn’t even wearing skates.

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